The Rest is History
by meganichan04
Summary: A fun little AU about Liz and Will's college days. And who's this Dr. Jack Sparrow...?
1. August

**Author's Note:** I have been insanely tempted for a while now to try my hand at an AU. And this is what happens, I guess, when my friends aren't there to step in and stop me from fulfilling stupid ideas. This fic is sort of dedicated to my awesome history teachers and Profs through the years, who somehow managed to make it really fun. Orch and Neel, I'm talking about you guys.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Jack, or Will, or Liz, or anybody. They belong to Disney. Nor do I get paid for making them dance to my crazy whims.

**For Your Info:** This fic is indeed, as stated above, my first attempt at an AU. I picked _Pirates_ to be my serial guinea pig because Jack and Will are funny no matter what you do with them. Enjoy, me hearties.

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"Come on, Will, hurry!" Taking her own advice, Elizabeth Swann began to jog.

Behind her, William Turner let out a huff. "Easy for you to say. You've made me carry your bag as well in this horrible heat." Shifting both backpacks from one shoulder to the other, he curiously regarded the back of the retreating girl. "What's the rush, Lizzie? We're not going to be late."

"No, but if we don't get there first there'll be no seats left in the front row."

"Why do you want to sit in the… oh." Will's expression darkened. Now he remembered. Something very… _bothersome_ waited in the stately brick and mortar building they were fast approaching.

It was only their third day of college, and already his worst fear had come to pass. Elizabeth Swann, his dearest childhood friend and secret love (though he would never tell her so) was making eyes at another man. Will sighed forlornly as they made their way up the steps and into the slightly cooler depths of the History and Languages building.

"Elizabeth, are you sure that you want to sit in the very front?" he asked hesitantly as they ascended to the second floor. "We could sit back a few rows, couldn't we? Or in the middle? I hear the last row in the back is nice for napping."

"William, I refuse to believe that you of all people would nap!" Elizabeth laughed. "If it's all the same, I'd prefer the front row. We'll take better notes there." She paused as they reached the correct hallway to pat her hair back into place. "Besides, I have a good feeling about this class. Don't you think our professor was… interesting?"

Will resisted the impulse to snort. "He dashed into the room, threw a syllabus at us, and dismissed the class. If that sets the standard, I'm not sure we'll be learning much history this semester."

Elizabeth shrugged, dismissing the incident with a flick of her styled hair. "Well, he is a professor. I'm sure his first day was as hectic as ours. Surely today we'll begin to work."

However, it seemed that no one was going to be doing any work at the moment. What appeared to be half the class was standing or sitting in the hall outside the classroom, which appeared to be occupied.

Will was puzzled. (Not that he didn't usually look puzzled, mind you, but at least this time there was obvious cause for his puzzlement.) "This is the right room, isn't it?" he wondered, fishing absently in his backpack for the course schedule.

"Yes, it's right… maybe this class has just run over." Tiptoeing to the door, Elizabeth peeked in the tiny window. "Oh, it's a language class. I think they're speaking German."

"Are they stopping?" Will asked, peering over her shoulder. "Maybe the room's clock is off by a few minutes."

"No… no, I don't think so… in fact I think it's just begun. Oh, look, they're singing the national anthem."

The other students in the hall were beginning to grumble. This cheered Will somewhat. He looked hopefully at Elizabeth. "Well, if there's been a mix-up and we have no room to hold class in, and seeing as how the professor has not even bothered to arrive on time, perhaps we should consider taking an early lunch?"

A frustrated shout from down the hall curtailed his plans, however. "No you don't! Don't _even!_ This class is absolutely not dismissed yet!"

Will sighed resignedly as their harried instructor came dashing down the corridor. "Better late than never, I suppose…"

Stepping nimbly over the students who had yet to get up off the floor, the panting instructor came to a halt before the door and without preamble dropped a heavy briefcase into Will's arms. "The parking around here is bloody horrible! Hold this for me, would ye, mate? Ye'd think they'd have a garage built for their loyal faculty, but _no_… and who the hell is in me bloody room?"

"Good afternoon, sir." Elizabeth gave him a winning smile. Will was held speechless, staring at the case that had suddenly appeared in his arms. "We believe it might be a German class."

Dark eyes narrowed. "German? In _my_ lecture hall? We'll see about that. Es'cuse me, luv." Brushing past Elizabeth, he shoved open the door and disappeared inside, letting the heavy oak slam shut behind him.

Amused, Elizabeth again peeked into the window to witness their irate instructor stomping to the front of the class. "Interesting, isn't he, Will?"

Will managed to find his voice at last. "Interesting? You call _this_ interesting?" He swung the briefcase to and fro in front of her. "I call this assuming and rude! And the man's got_ beads_ in his hair!"

"And what may I ask do beads have to do with any… wait, listen."

A confrontation was brewing inside.

"Yes, I don't think ye fully understand… No… no… no,_ you _listen! This is _my_ room, not yours! …Well it's not my fault there's a Japanese class in your little German area… How the hell should I know how they got in there?! First week back is always screwed around, you should know that… Yes? … Is that so? …Well I'm not leaving either! This is _my_ room, so you and your young German speakers will just have to--"

There was shouting in German.

"Alright! No! I'm_ going_, damn ye, don't throw the planner!" A moment later the door burst open, brought forth their professor, and rapidly closed again. A course planner connected with the back of it immediately thereafter, exploding in a maelstrom of copy paper.

The students stared.

"I'll take that back now, lad." Will silently surrendered the briefcase as, with well-disguised huffiness, the professor straightened his jacket and red bandana. "A-hem. It seems there's been a slight mix-up in room assignments. Not to worry though, there's a spare room right down this way that we'll use until I get me _own room_ back on Friday. Now, if ye'll proceed down this way…"

Slowly the class gathered their belongings and began to move down the hall to the substitute room. Will did not fail to notice, however, that their professor remained behind. Glancing quickly about to check for witnesses, he threw open the door to the commandeered room.

"Hail Hitler!" he cried, throwing the Nazi salute, and slammed the door again. Grabbing a flabbergasted Will by the elbow, he set off at a run after the rest of the class. "Come on, lad, we're behind schedule already and swift death approaches wearing Lederhosen."

Luckily they managed to gain the door of the new classroom before the enraged, yet rather tubby, German professor. Dazed, Will dropped into the seat Elizabeth had saved for him in the front row. He was paying exorbitant tuition fees for _this?_

"Alrighty, then, let's get started. It's a little crowded in here, but we're troopers an' we'll make due." Plunking the briefcase down onto the desk, the beaded, braided man grabbed a piece of chalk and began to scribble on the blackboard. "Now, as ye might have all gathered from the syllabus, my name is Dr. Jack Sparrow."

Will noticed with much disgust that Elizabeth was doodling the name onto her notebook in swirly letters.

"That said, I want no one callin' me Professor, or Mister, or Sir, or Uncle Jackie, or anythin' of that nature. Ye'll all address me as Captain or Cap'n Sparrow, and you will be collectively referred to as me crew. That clear?"

There was a muted chorus of affirmative replies. Will glanced at Elizabeth, hoping for some support in the opinion that their new history professor was an escaped mental patient. No help there; she was carefully crossing out the title Dr. on her notebook and penning in Captain.

Will stifled a groan. He hated this class already.

Dropping the chalk back into the tray, Dr. Jack Sparrow turned to his new class. "As I'm sure you're all aware, this course deals primarily with ancient history. That's cavemen up through Greek and Egyptian gods, myths, explorations and adventures all the way until about the Renaissance, after which things get borin' fast. Now, first off I'm just goin' to say--"

The door popped open and a spectacled boy peeked in. "Excuse me, is this colonial history?"

"Er, no."

"Oh. Sorry." The door closed again with a soft snick.

Shaking his head quickly as if to retrieve his train of thought, "Captain" Sparrow again addressed the class. "As I was sayin'… I know that not all of ye like history. Some of ye might find it flat out borin.' Well, that's all about to change!"

Will and Elizabeth exchanged glances as the professor unceremoniously shoved his desk out of the way and began to pace grandly back and forth, waving a wooden yardstick to illustrate his point. Liz grinned. Will did not.

"The first thing I intend to pound into your sleepy little skulls, dear students o' mine, is that history is nothing but a story. One great big beautiful story, one grand tale of high adventure passed down through the countless ages--!"

The door opened again. A girl with fiery red hair walked in and looked about, apparently confused. "I'm sorry, but is this colonial history?"

"No… no, this is definitely _ancient_ history," Jack said loudly. "Try again another time. Now, as I was sayin' _again_…"

Will held back a snicker as the girl wandered out, staring confusedly at her course schedule. It appeared that their professor did not much care to be interrupted when he was on a roll. Will made a mental note to ask _lots_ of questions in the very middle of lecture.

"A-hem. One big story, tales of grand adventure… oh, yes. And the beauty of history is, ye'll never really know exactly what happened! All we have to go on is hearsay an' documented accounts, but who's to say no one fibbed a little in the telling? The past is never one hundred percent certain! Hence--"

The door creaked open.

"This is _not_ colonial history!" Captain Sparrow yelled, smacking the yardstick hard against the blackboard.

A startled face beat a hasty retreat and the door slammed once again. Elizabeth hid a smile as a few stifled sounds of amusement drifted up from the class. Will bit his bottom lip against the encroaching chuckles.

"_Hence!_" Seizing the drawstring to the coiled canvas above the blackboard, the professor gave it a sharp jerk. The large bolt of fabric unrolled, unveiling a panorama of ancient wonders.

Elizabeth made a cute little "oooh" noise as she beheld the pretty pictures of Greek, Norse, and Egyptian deities across the top of the page. Around the sides and bottom were depicted scenes of ancient India and China, Africa and Japan. Vikings clashed and medieval knights galloped. Even Will had to admit he was mildly impressed.

"History is Mystery!" the Captain declared triumphantly, quoting the statement woven into the very middle of the picture. "Treat it as such an' give it the respect an' contemplation it deserves, an' it will never let you down. Ye'll never be disappointed, I can assure ye that. Now, me little partners on the wond'rous journey into the past, open yer textbooks to page--"

The door flew open.

Quick as lightning Jack's arm shot out, a dirty eraser filled with chalk nailing the intruder directly on the right temple. A large pouf of chalk dust filled the air in the immediate vicinity and covered the trespasser in a fine layer of white.

"Get out of me room, ye little colonial twerp!" he cried, brandishing the yardstick in a way that made most of the students in the front row duck. (Will did not, all but daring the man to hit him and make his day.)

The intruder hacked and coughed, gagging on the chalk dust, before straightening and sending a furious glare at the glowering professor. There was a moment of recognition as the two stared each other down.

Jack's eyes narrowed as he cautiously lowered the yardstick. "Oh, it's you, Norry. Sorry, I didn't recognize ye or I'da thrown somethin' heavier."

The class watched silently, attention rapt as the newcomer haughtily inclined his head and calmly began to wipe the chalk dust off his face. "Jack Sparrow. I might have known."

"That's _Dr._ Jack Sparrow to you, you colonial ninny!" Jack shrieked, breaking the yardstick across Will's desk. Elizabeth bounced in excitement. "If ye've got nothin' constructive to say then get out of me class!"

"As it happens I _do_ have something very much of import to tell you, Sparrow!" the other shot back, still swiping at his watering eyes. "It might interest you to know that _you_ are in fact the one intruding on _my_ territory, as it were. This room was scheduled to be used by my class for the 12:00 to 13:15 block. Now, if you'll kindly pack up and move along, perhaps we can still manage to get something accomplished toda--"

"Never!" Jack yelled, grabbing the nearest object to him (a stapler) and throwing it at Dr. James Norrington. "All be buggered if I'll let yer colonial pansies displace me class again! Get out!"

"You're crazy, you know that?!" Professor Norrington yelled before he was unceremoniously thrown back out into the hallway with his room-less class. "This isn't over, Sparrow! I'll have that room, it's mine by right!"

"Blah, blah, blah," Jack mocked, slamming and locking the door. "You think I like bein' here in yer smelly little room? There's Lederhosen and frankfurters in _my_ room, an' ye don't see me complainin' about it!"

"I swear, Sparrow, I'll call the department head! I'll call campus security!"

There was silence as the Captain regarded this new threat. He stared thoughtfully at the door, absently tugging at his bearded goatee. The class waited with bated breath.

"This is ludicrous," Will muttered, face buried in his hands. He was seriously wishing that he had just gone with his first instincts and signed up for the geology elective instead. Rocks and minerals rarely made him want to scream in frustration.

"Alright, crew," came the orders after some deliberation. "It appears we have no choice. Please pick up yer books…"

Will sighed in relief, grabbing up his supplies. Finally the delusional man had heard the call of reason and taken heed! He was about to rise from his chair when the commanding voice hardened.

"…and prepare to throw them at that door as hard as ye can, because we are not going to surrender this room! I want every nancy who sticks their grubby little face this side o' that door nailed! Toss to hit, men and women, aim for the noses!"

"This is insane!" Will declared loudly as Elizabeth jumped from her chair, textbook in hand and the light of battle in her blue eyes. To his horror, the rest of the class immediately followed her lead. "This is just a stupid mistake! These are our _fellow students_, for Godsake! Are we really going to _fight_ them for a stupid _classroom?_"

"Aye, lad, it's the rule of the jungle I'm afraid." Jack was pacing at the front of the room, waiting for the enemy to make their move. "In these parts it's oust or be ousted. Ye'll get used to it in time, especially when ye're late to class and have to find un-metered parking."

Will stared, horrified.

"Ready the ammunition!"

"Captain," Elizabeth called. "I have a question."

"Yes, luv?"

"May we use other ammunition besides books?" she queried, giving her heavy plastic water bottle an appraising stare.

"Elizabeth!" Will cried, scandalized.

Jack positively crowed. "Have at it, ye little warrior minx! Use whatever comes to mind-- er, hand, as the case may be. See now, this lass knows what she's doing! Everybody follow her example an' ye'll go far in this class, ye can lay to that!"

Will slowly sank back into his seat. "This is not happening… this can _not_ be happening…" he muttered faintly, over and over. This was_ not_ what college was supposed to be like, he was sure… maybe he'd missed the section about impending insanity in the brochure?

There was a sudden, violent thud against the door that caused the old oak framing to creak alarmingly. One of the taller students rose on tiptoe to peer through the glass at the top of the door.

"Looks like they're using a hallway bench as a battering ram, Captain," he reported with a disbelieving grin. "Holy crap, this history thing ain't so bad after all! I might even come to class every day for this!"

"That's the spirit, man." Digging through his briefcase, Jack discovered and pulled forth what appeared to be a container of pepper spray. "Ah, yes, there ye are me little luvly, an' ye've got Norry's name written all over ye! Crew, prepare for immediate retaliation!"

Another thud against the door. All hands stood ready, books poised for flight. William Turner was nearly in tears… when Jack looked at his watch. He did a double take.

"Damn, is that really the time? It is? Damn again!" Stuffing the pepper spray back into the briefcase, Captain Sparrow directed a charming, though rather sheepish, smile at his class. "I'm goin' to have to skip out on this fight, lads an' lasses. It seems we've managed to run outta time, an' yer beloved professor has somewhere to be if he doesn't want evicted from his current berth. We'll pick up next week in the correct room, remember that."

"You're _leaving?_" Will all but squealed as Jack propped open the window. "After provoking another professor and setting his class out for our blood you're _leaving?!_ And we're on the second floor, you idiot, don't go out the _window!_"

"Thanks for your concern, lad, but it's quite unnecessary. There is, indeed, a tree outside this window. Take care, now." Gripping the handle of the briefcase tightly in his teeth, Jack crawled out his improvised emergency exit and began to shimmy down the tree.

Will stared in disbelief. Elizabeth waved a sad goodbye. There was yet another thud, louder than ever, on the much-abused door.

With a violent rustle of maple leaves, their professor's dreadlocked head momentarily hove back into view. "By the way, ye might want to consider doin' yer classmates a favor an' brace that door. Norry's quite the unreasonable bugger when he's angry. A big, strappin' lad like yerself between 'im an' the crew would do a world o' good."

Then he was gone.

"Oh God, Will, he's going to kill us!" Elizabeth cried as the door rocked on its hinges. "Do something!"

"So you're only sensible when the ringleader's gone, I guess?!" Will yelled, throwing his shoulder against the buckling door. For a moment he wished he'd been a football player. "Don't just stand there, everybody help me!"

"Parlay, we want to parlay!" Elizabeth shouted frantically through the rapidly forming cracks. "Oh, this isn't good... Parlay, I said!"

Will spared a moment, smashed against the splintering door by half his new classmates, to wonder if this was what his life in the world of higher learning might really be like. He prayed not, he really did… but at the same time… No, most definitely not. He'd be a college dropout before he'd enjoy this madness!

And the next time they met, that so-called "professor" had another thing coming…

**O.O.O.O.O**

To Be Continued

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**(2****nd****) Author's Note:** Well, I feel better. At least I'm not trippin' over the plot bunnies anymore… I kept it short on purpose, just because of other, more pressing, concerns. (Math class, blegh! There's a reason Jack's a history Prof!)

I _might_… _maybe_… _possibly_… continue this thing, if anybody likes it. I don't wanna waste valuable time on something that's just silly, after all. But I do still have a few spare bunnies lying around in the corners if there happens to pop up another chapter or two in the future. Hope you liked the first bit, anyways. Thanks for reading, and hope to see you again soon!


	2. September

**Author's Note:** Hey there everybody! I'm really sorry it took so long to get the second chapter of this up. Oh, well. I blame school, first and foremost, and then a bunch of other distractible-like things. And heavy writers' block. Anyway, on to chapter two!

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the _Pirates_ characters or make any money from writing this. Maybe if I did, I'd be rich already and I wouldn't have to go to college myself…

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"Isn't this exciting, Will? Oh, I wonder what Captain Sparrow's surprise will be! He was _so_ excited about it last time, I'm sure it's something wonderful!"

Elizabeth Swann grinned happily as she dropped into her favorite seat in the front row of the history room. The young man who followed slowly behind her, however, was not smiling in the least.

"Whatever it is I'm sure it can't be anything normal." William Turner sighed as he slumped dejectedly into the desk beside Elizabeth. "Remember his last 'surprise?' He brought that awful cat in here and we had to treat it like royalty for a week."

"The ancient Egyptians did worship cats, Will," Elizabeth reminded him, digging for her notebook. "It was a hands-on experience to go with that portion of the class. Besides, I thought Her Majesty Queen Bastet was a lovely kitty."

Will did not agree. "Why can't he just be like every other professor at this college and give us pop quizzes as his 'surprises?' At least quizzes don't scratch you."

Elizabeth blinked innocently. "What fun would that be?"

Before Will could reply, quick footsteps were heard in the hall. Within moments, the door blew open to reveal their instructor. The entire class went still, staring with wide eyes as he slowly sashayed to the front of the room.

"Oh, Captain!" Elizabeth squealed.

"Oh, God," Will groaned.

Professor "Captain" Jack Sparrow was living up to his name. Gone was his usual post-hippie biker ensemble, and in its place a transformation had occurred. Ragged trousers and knee boots had replaced faded blue jeans and steel-toes. A long brown coat adorned with buttons and buckles had taken the place of a leather vest, and a worn three cornered hat sat jauntily atop the usual red bandana. Myriad sashes, belts, rings and bangles completed the ensemble.

Stopping at the front of the room, Captain Sparrow surveyed his stunned pupils. "Right then. Today is the nineteenth day of September. Know ye what extra-special day that be, me hearties?"

"Well it isn't Halloween, if you were wondering," Will said loudly.

Both Elizabeth and the professor sent him a dirty look. "Thank ye, lad, fer pointing out the bloody obvious. If any of ye scurvy scoundrels paid any attention to the holidays at all, ye'd know that today is the greatest one of the year: International Talk Like A Pirate Day!"

Will sighed, digging an elbow into the desk and propping his chin on his fist. "Oh, I should have guessed. How thoughtless of me. Can't _believe_ I missed that on the calendar."

"Here now young whelp, less sarcasm and more piratical dialect. Yer participation grade for the day depends on it. Extra points will be awarded for creative insults that are not directed at the captain."

"Aye, Captain! This'll be fun!" Elizabeth chirped happily.

"Aye, avast," Will muttered, face in his arms. "I'd rather be keelhauled than sit through an hour o' this, arrrgh."

"Come now, lad." Strolling forward, Jack patted Will's shoulder condescendingly. "I thought all boys like to play pirates."

"And I thought you hated the Colonial period, which ironically is when the most famous of the pirates lived, sailed, and killed each other."

Captain Sparrow blinked. "Just keep it up, there, William. Snippy whelps like you wind up in the brig… and, since we have no brig at the moment, ye'll be locked in the prop closet."

Will's eye twitched at the mention of the commandeered storage closet across the hall; that dark, evil space where his insane instructor stashed all his period costumes, props, and miscellaneous junk that wouldn't fit in the classroom. "Do it and you'll be staring at a lawsuit so fast—"

"Now crew," Jack announced loudly, "I'll just be passin' out these sheets. Make sure ye all get one, they're very important. Once everyone's got a paper we will commence with our ITLAPD celebration by singin' the theme song fer it, understand?"

There was a general murmur of contentment from the class. A few were even trying out various pirate-themed insults on one another, more than happy to go along with the fun in order to be spared from any real work for the day.

"Alright, make like the hull's full of plunder and yer stomach's full of rum, everybody. Pity some of ye are underage, or there'd be real rum to enhance the experience. Now then, all of ye have a sheet? Good! From the top, and put some feeling into it, crew!" And the professor began to sing.

"I have to go to the restroom," Will muttered, and promptly fled. He spared a moment to be thankful that Elizabeth was too preoccupied, singing lustily along as she was, to notice his departure. He would hide in the little tiled room until the madness passed and it was safe to come out.

He had only been in the men's room a few minutes, however, when the raucous singing suddenly stopped mid-stanza and ceased to filter through the walls. Despite his better judgment William Turner slunk slowly back to the history room, dreading what he might find.

_This whole course is an absolute joke,_ he fumed. _I'd report that man to the dean if Lizzie didn't like him so much. Oh, well. Nothing can keep me from speaking my mind when it comes time for the all-holy instructor evaluations._

Yes, he was really looking forward to those evaluations.

**O.O.O.O.O**

Will wasn't the least bit surprised to discover, upon cautiously reentering the room, that in less than five minutes their brave "captain" had somehow managed to become embroiled in a heated shouting match with his mortal rival, Professor James Norrington of the Colonial History 101 class next door. After all, it did happen on a weekly basis.

"Where did you go, Will?" Elizabeth whispered, eyes never leaving the combatants.

"Oh, you know… out." He watched the two instructors stare coldly at one another as they circled like sharks, neither willing to back down. The confrontations were always mildly amusing, and Sparrow usually got himself so riled up during them that he then forgot to give out assignments. Will enjoyed those days, when he could kick back and simply read the textbook.

"And just how do you expect my students to concentrate on their quizzes with your lot over here bellowing like they're being slowly murdered, Sparrow? It travels right through the walls! I'll blame any and all poor marks on you, see if I won't."

"Well maybe if ye'd give the poor kids somethin' a bit more stimulating to work on than a borin' ol' _quiz_ they'd get better grades! Quizzes are no measure of a person's intelligence."

"Midterms are in two weeks, Sparrow! You think I want them all to fail the standardized tests the superiors send me? I'd wager you've not even mentioned the need to begin studying for them to your class. I sincerely want all of my students to pass the course and I, unlike _some_ people in this department, do not wish to lose my position." He swiftly turned to address the class. "Who here has read the text? Anyone?"

Will slowly raised his hand.

"One. One out of how many? Thirty or so? Sparrow, that's pitiful."

"No, that's an eager learner. Ye get one of 'em every once in a while. But I'm sure ye're too busy over there praisin' the theft an' colonization of other people's dirt to notice one if they jumped up an' asked ye fer extra credit!"

"Hear that, Will?" Elizabeth asked as the men's slightly civil conversation degenerated into a vicious exchange of insults. "He praised you just now! See, I told you Captain Sparrow notices how hard you work."

Will considered. Hmm, maybe it wasn't so bad that he'd gotten carried away on their last writing assignment and gone on for over ten pages. At least the professor, insane though he might be, seemed to be noticing the effort that Will was putting into the assignments.

"That's the last straw!" Norrington finally cried. "I'm not about to stand here and listen to you insult my teaching methods!"

"Likewise!" Jack pointed firmly out the door. "So just prance on back to your own space and stay out of mine until ye have somethin' constructive to add to the class, ye hear?"

"Oh, I'll have something_ constructive_ to add when I return, you can count on that!"

Elizabeth winced as he stalked out and slammed the door behind him. "Oh dear, I think he means business this time."

Will yawned. "Looks like."

"But really, he's in the wrong, isn't he, Will?" she pressed. "The captain's methods might be a bit… different, but I'm sure we're still learning everything we're supposed to be."

"I guess midterms will decide that." Will wasn't worried, as he had been reading the book as well as coming to class and doing all the assignments, but he wondered how the rest of the class would fare. He made a vow then and there to help Elizabeth study every evening until the exam, just to be on the safe side.

"Right then." Brushing off his coat and adjusting his hat, the professor pulled a bundle of rolled posters from behind his desk and strutted in the direction of the blackboard. "Now that the barnacle brain has deigned to take himself an' his stupidity elsewhere, per'aps we can get back to business."

"Aye, avast!" Will growled, whipping out pen and notebook. The sooner he accepted the madness and moved on the sooner it would be over. That had become his philosophy regarding the course in general.

Captain Sparrow smiled pityingly, stepping lightly over the long case that protruded from under Will's desk. "Points fer effort, lad, points fer effort. Kindly move yer clarinet case, or whatever that is."

Will bristled, going red as Elizabeth's discreet laughter reached his ears. "It's _not _a clarinet." Angrily he scooped up the case and tilted it against the leg of his desk. "And I'd imply something about using it on you, if that wouldn't be considered a direct threat to the life of a faculty member."

"Oh really, lad?" The captain agreeably dropped a hand onto the case and leaned his weight against the arm. "If yer not in fact pursuin' musical diversions, what might I ask _have_ ye got in here?"

"Will's on the fencing team," Elizabeth said proudly as her friend wrenched the case out from under their professor's palm and snapped open the fastenings. "He's very good with a sword."

"Indeed. I used to dabble a bit in swords meself."

Something in the man's tone made Will's eyes narrow. "Then you knew what it was all along," he accused, staring hard at the smiling professor. He'd figure out this weirdo's game if it was the last thing he did that day.

"I must confess, I was hopin' ye might be willin' to help me demonstrate a proper pirate sword fight fer the class." Jack's smile widened. "Unless yer afraid I might beat ye."

"What did you say?" Will demanded.

"Now, now, don't get upset. No shame in wishin' to stay in yer own league, lad."

"I am _not_ afraid of _anything_ related to you!"

Angry flush still dusting his cheeks, Will sprang from his desk so fast the metal legs shrieked against the tile. Expertly lifting the light, slim weapon from its case he moved quickly away from the rest of the intently watching class and, facing Jack, dropped into the correct ready stance.

"Ooh, someone's got his game face on," Elizabeth grinned.

"Whenever you're ready, _Captain_."

Surprisingly, though, the professor made no move to arm himself. He had a strange look on his face. Crossing his arms over his chest, he stood very still and looked Will over thoughtfully. "Hmm... without yer hair pulled back I'd almost say ye'd look like... no, that can't be... Say, lad? Not to wander off topic, but what might yer last name be?"

Will blinked at the odd question. Why? Didn't the man read it over and over again at the top of all his assignments? "It's Turner. Common enough."

"And might yer middle name be Anthony?"

William Anthony Turner abruptly felt a cold chill. "…yes, yes it is. How did you know that?"

Captain Sparrow ignored the question. "And might yer father's name be William as well? And mightn't he have also been the one to interest ye in fencin' in the first place?"

"Yes! What are you getting at?!" Will yelled, beginning to feel a little concerned. His enemy somehow knew all about him and his family! This was starting to look like a bad horror movie.

"I knew it!" Jack crowed, dark eyes lighting up with delight. "I know yer old man, lad! William 'Bootstrap Bill' Turner and I go way back! We went to school together back in the day."

"Oh, really?" Elizabeth blinked, very interested. Will stared mutely.

"O' course. I knew the moment I laid eyes on this whelp there was somethin' familiar about him. Why, I bet the last time I saw you ye were barely taller than yer papa's knee, William! I remember last time I visited Bill an' yer charmin' mother, you toddled back an' forth between us fer the longest time…"

"My father does not know you." Will said the words as calmly and with as much conviction as he could muster. "I had never met you before attending this class. And you most certainly have never been near my home."

"Sure I have. Don't ye remember yer dad ever talkin' about ol' Jakkie? Some of his wildest fraternity stories star me an' him together, I guarantee it." The professor smiled, lost in fond memories. "How about that, ol' Bootstrap's own boy a star pupil in me own class. An' a spunky whelp he is, at that, just like his dad. Who'd have imagined I'd get so lucky?"

"Isn't that something, Will?" Elizabeth beamed. "Small world!"

"No!" Will declared loudly, sinking quickly into the first stages of deep denial. "It isn't true! It's not possible!"

"Oh, come now, lad, I wouldn't lie to ye! Ye can trust yer Uncle Jakkie. An' fer you I'll make an exception an' let ye call me that, seein' as how I'm practically family to yer dad—"

Will could take no more. Slowly he backed away from their grinning instructor, turning to run only when he could see the door in the corner of his eye. However, he momentarily forgot that he was still gripping his fencing saber, nearly leading to a potentially icky accident involving the person standing in the doorway at the time.

"My God, I'm so sorry!" Will gasped, thankful at least that he had been holding the weapon point down. "I didn't see you there, and—"

Against all odds, the imposing visitor merely glanced down at the blade quivering in the wall next to his thigh before brushing Will off. "Pray don't mention it, young man. Jack Sparrow?"

"I prefer _Professor_ Jack Sparrow, actually," the captain said with an extremely pleasant and extremely strained smile. "And to what, might I inquire, do we owe this unexpected visit from our dear departmental head?"

"Besides the allowance of live steel in the classroom, I have something of some import to speak with you about. You and your good friend Professor Norrington." The stiff stranger, newly revealed as one of some authority, beckoned out the door. "If you'd be so kind as to follow me this way…"

"Why not? Luv'ly day fer a stroll." With a smile that clearly stated he would rather be receiving a root canal Captain Sparrow followed the man out, calling back over his shoulder. "Won't be a moment, crew."

There was an immediate buzz of conversation upon their exit.

"So that's the head of the history department?" Will asked, gently teasing his saber out of the wood beside the door. He hoped it hadn't been bent or scratched. Next time he'd remember to be much more careful.

"Yes, that's Professor Beckett." Elizabeth chewed worriedly at a nail. "I hear he's supposed to be an absolute monster! They say his classes are so hard that no more than half the students ever pass them. I hope he's not going to… you know… _do_ anything to the Captain."

"I'm sure he'll be just fine."

"But Will, what if they try to fire him or something? That would be awful!"

"Don't worry about it, Lizzie." Will blew unconcernedly on the flat of his blade before placing it back in its case. "Something tells me 'Captain' Sparrow is the sort who can weasel out of _anything_ unscathed."

**O.O.O.O.O**

The prediction proved true in due course. Soon enough Jack reappeared, none the worse for what must have surely been an unpleasant ordeal.

"What's up, Cap'n?" the girl behind Will asked, snapping her gum. "You tell that dude where to go?"

"Actually he told me," the professor replied sourly, readjusting his pirate gear. "Seems darling Norry has, very dishonorably I might say, tattled 'pon us, crew. I've been informed that if a single one of ye fails the midterm exam, which shall be written and drawn up by Beckett himself, yer dear captain is to take a trip downtown to the unemployment office."

Elizabeth, along with most of the class, gasped in horror. "Why those lily-livered, _seaweed-sucking_ sardines!" she cried in righteous fury.

"Exactly. _However._" Jack smiled slightly. "What that pompous son of a sea cow's auntie has forgotten is that I happen to have a binding contract with this prestigious place of learning that can only be terminated by the dean herself. B'sides, I have complete faith in you, men and women of me loyal crew. Ace that bloody test an' make yer captain proud!"

"But that's, like, two weeks away and we haven't read anything!" came a panicked yell from the back. "Everybody says that guy's tests _kill!_ How are we all supposed to pass something like that?"

"Not to worry, crew. We have an ace in the hole." Straightening his coat importantly, Jack strode behind Will's chair and clapped two strong hands onto his shoulders. "From this day forth until the date of the exam we shall have a nightly study and review session. And I hereby place Master Turner in charge of it."

Will's eyes bugged. "_What?!_"

"Oh, thank God, Will!" Elizabeth reached over from her desk and managed to wrap her dumbfounded friend in a grateful hug. "I know you won't let any of us fail!"

"But I… I… I…" Will stammered.

"That's right, lad, _you_." Very fondly, Captain Sparrow patted his shoulder. "I leave it in your capable hands to turn this crew into a lean, mean, exam-passing machine. And… looks like that's all the time we have today! Class dismissed, me hearties, an' don't forget to drop by an' run yer creative pirate insults past me ear fer that extra credit."

As one the class rose to their feet and surged for the door, paying no heed to their stuttering classmate still staring stupidly at the professor.

"I… I… I…"

**O.O.O.O.O**

Later that night…

Will blinked blearily at the clock, then turned it on its softly illuminated face. He yawned and stretched as hard as he possibly could. It would still be quite a while before he could sleep, so it was best he not see what time it really was.

Spread before him on the worn wood of his desk were countless notes and papers. He was doing his best to turn them into a study packet that would, with any amount of luck, help his class pass Beckett's monster midterm exam and save their professor's bacon from the fire.

_I should have told him off,_ Will thought tiredly as he rifled through the thick stack to find the section on Viking exploration. _I should have told him to do this himself. Except that I know he wouldn't. Something tells me I really am our only hope for passing this thing._

And the thing was that Will wouldn't have minded failing, really he wouldn't have, if not for one or two tiny considerations. Besides being worried for the sake of his own GPA, Will couldn't just stand by and let Sparrow be fired. Because…

"I love you, Elizabeth Swann!" Flinging open his desk drawer, Will pulled out a framed snapshot of freckled and curled eleven-year-old Elizabeth grinning from the deck of her father's sailboat and held it up to the light. "I'll work all night and help that pathetic excuse for a professor if that's what you really want! I'm doing it all for you, Lizzie—!"

"Hey, man, shut up!" Obviously very annoyed, the mussed head of Will's roommate suddenly appeared from under the mismatched sheets of one of the small room's two twin beds. "Some of us have eight o'clock classes tomorrow."

"Oh. Sorry!"

Quickly rubbing a smidge of dust off his treasure's frame, Will put it back into the drawer and made ready to go back to work. At least until his cell phone went off, launching into a loud and tinny rendition of _Battle Hymn of the Republic. _He dove on it at a snarl from his drowsy roommate and answered in a whisper.

"Sorry again! Hello?"

_/Hi there, Will! Hope I didn't wake you?/_

"No, Dad, I'm still up. What's going on?"

_/Oh, nothing much. Just thought I'd check up on you, is all. And I also wanted to tell you, I got a call from an old school pal of mine earlier this evening!/_

Will froze, the stack of papers sliding unnoticed off his desk to spiral in a chaotic whirl around the floor. "Yes?"

_/He told me you've got the best grades in his class! I can't believe I didn't think to ask you who your history Prof was, knowing Jack teaches there and all. Of course I invited him over for dinner the next time you're on break, him and Elizabeth both. Have we got some stories for you kids! Are you enjoying his class, Will? Will…? William? What's the matter? …Answer me, son! William!/_

As if in a dream, Will smiled. "Good night, Dad. Tell Mom I love her."

Very gently, William Turner closed his cell phone and returned to his studies, life having proved once again just how fair it was not. Oh, well. If in the morning he decided never to return to class, he could always join the Navy.

**O.O.O.O.O**

To be continued…

**o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o**

**(2****nd****) Author's Note:** Yes, apparently I want to torture myself further and keep this going. Please don't ask why, because I don't have an answer for you. I don't know why Will's supposed middle name is Anthony, either. It just sounded alright when I stuck it there.

I thought I'd be clever and do a chapter for every month of the semester Will and Liz are in Jack's class. Chapter one thus being August, the start of term, this one being the next month, September, and so on until the semester ends in December. So only three more chapters to go!

Yeah, I'm not an author. I'm a masochist.


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